Enjoy the Silence - and Find out What Your Client is Really Thinking

Silence can be uncomfortable. In social situations we instinctively want to fill the quiet moments with conversation – sometimes intelligent and meaningful, sometimes not. In a presentation or client meeting, silence, while still sometimes uncomfortable, can be a good thing. It can actually help the communication process.

So, how do we communicate more while saying nothing?

The power of the pause

First of all, a brief pause is a great way to emphasize that you have just said something important. During a presentation a moment of silence can seem like an age to the presenter - but it will always seem much shorter to your audience. So don’t feel uncomfortable about letting your words hang in the air for a while. It’s a signal to the audience that they should be paying special attention to what you just said - and that they should be absorbing and reflecting on something they have been told.

The pause is part of your communication, so look for the signs that this is happening. Is your audience smiling, nodding or shaking their head in a way that you would expect them to if they had fully understood what you just said? If you don’t pick up the expected signs of recognition and reflection go ahead and repeat the point, perhaps worded slightly differently.

Your presentation planning will have identified the key points that need to be communicated and understood. Use the power of the pause to make sure that your client is taking your key points on board. Plan pauses into your presentation like you would any other aspect of the delivery.

A pause for thought

Pauses are also useful and highly significant in meetings, whether informal or as part of the bidding and tender process.

Consider this familiar scenario: You have just asked your client a particularly important question; they don’t answer straight away but look at you thoughtfully. What do you do?

1. Assume that you have just made life difficult for them by asking a challenging question that they cannot answer easily. Desperate to save them embarrassment and to maintain your relationship you jump in and try to clarify the question?
2. Look on the delay as an opportunity to promote your solution by feeding the client with the ‘right’ answer.?
3. Recognise that your client is giving your question the respect it deserves. You keep quiet, maintain eye contact (without staring), and give them as much time as they need to formulate an intelligent and thoughtful response.?
   

Which of these are you most likely to do? And which one is most likely to provide you with information that is going to significantly help your chances of winning the business?

If it takes your client a while to start answering your questions take this as a positive sign. They are thinking about what you have told them and they are considering the most appropriate response. If you have correctly identified your most important questions, thoughtful responses are what you want.

A great way to get really important information (the stuff you won’t find in the tender specification) is to ask a very open question and wait as long as it takes for an answer. The opposite of this is to ask a lot of closed or narrow questions in an attempt to lead the client into giving the answers you want to hear.

If you recently failed to win a contract you thought was ‘nailed on’ think back to whether there were any awkward silences in your meetings with the client. If there weren't any, were you maybe too busy talking to give the client the chance to absorb your message or to tell you what you needed to know to win the business? Sometimes silence really can be golden.

Hugh Graham, The Bid Coach
I coach teams to win more business through bids and tenders - helping them to develop persuasive presentation skills and to manage the bidding process effectively.

Contact: hugh@thebidcoach.co.uk visit our website: www.thebidcoach.co.uk or call (01963) 240555

Click here to get regular updates from The Bid Coach

Hugh Graham, The Bid Coach
I coach teams to win more business through bids and tenders - helping them to develop persuasive presentation skills and to manage the bidding process effectively.

Contact: hugh@thebidcoach.co.uk visit our website www.thebidcoach.co.uk or call (01963) 240555

Click here to get regular updates from The Bid Coach

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